


Tienimi le mani, non annegherai

by xKobra_Kid



Series: Nothing Special [2]
Category: Panic! at the Disco
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M, Makeup Sex, Party, Post-Break Up, it's just mentioned, there isn't actual smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-02
Updated: 2017-07-02
Packaged: 2018-11-22 08:27:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11376390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xKobra_Kid/pseuds/xKobra_Kid
Summary: “Get off of me, Brendon. I don’t want to deal with your shit anymore.” He wiped his cheek and stood up, giving Brendon the bag full of clothes and other items. “Just call a fucking cab and go away.”Brendon looked up at him and sighed, he stood up as well and faced Dallon, biting his lower lip and hugging himself with his arms, feeling cold and exhausted. “I’m in love with you, I’m telling you the truth.”Dallon said nothing.*“Brendon!” Spencer shouted smiling. “Brendon wait a second.”“What?” He said stepping out of the lift.“There’s this party to-”“No.”“C’mon, we’ll have fun I promise.” Spencer said grabbing his arms gently. “Linda will be there, too, and you promised her that you would come with us.”Brendon whined and sighed. “Fine, fine.” He mumbled. “I’m already regretting this.”





	Tienimi le mani, non annegherai

That day went by in a blurry way, Brendon spent his hours doing nothing since Dallon had decided to do everything by himself. Spencer observed them and then he tried to make Brendon talk, which ended up in ten minutes of silence. On the other side, Dallon was organizing his office, signing random sheets of paper and checking his bank account, seeing that his shares in the stock exchange were higher than the day before.   
Outside was dark, there was no stars in the sky and the wind was blowing gently through the leaves on the trees. It was almost 9 p.m. and Dallon was still in his office while Brendon was outside, waiting patiently. He didn’t know if he should go home by himself or if he should wait for Dallon and talk, maybe he could try to figure things out. Brendon really hoped so, he didn’t want to throw away that relationship, he knew that he had fucked up, he knew that, but Dallon should have tried understand his opinion.   
Perhaps Brendon was completely wrong, everyone could see that clearly. Brendon was ashamed of his actions, he was ashamed of what he had done but that wouldn’t stop him from sorting things out with Dallon. He was pretty sure that they could talk like adults and decide what to do, after all Dallon was an understanding person and Brendon was sure that he would listen to him. They were great together, they clicked like puzzle pieces, and Brendon felt bad for what he had done, ruining that relationship had hurt more than expected.   
Brendon was assorted in his thoughts, he was pondering about what he had to say and he didn’t hear Dallon’s office door open and then close. He jumped on his feet when he noticed him standing in front of him, his eyes tired and his face blank. Brendon felt a shiver ran down his spine, he had never seen Dallon so emotionless, so empty. He tried to look at him right in the eyes but he couldn’t, Dallon’s eyes had always been full of emotions and sentiments but in that moment they were flat and cold.   
“What are you doing here?” Even his voice was different and Brendon scrunched up his nose. “You should be at my house packing your stuff.”   
“I thought that we could talk.” He murmured running a hand through his hair. “About, you know, about us.”   
“There’s nothing to talk about, Brendon.” Dallon swallowed hard and sighed. “Tomorrow I’ll try to change secretary, it should take a week or two but the CEO will find something for you.”   
Brendon shook his head and looked at his feet. “Can’t we sort this out? We could always find a solution to this.”  
“I’ve already find one.” Brendon tried to speak but Dallon looked harshly at him. “No, I don’t care if you don’t agree with it. You chose what to do, you did this, deal with the consequences.” He spat venomously at him. “I will drive you to my place so you can pack your things, sleeping in a hotel room for few days wouldn’t be that bad.”   
“No, no listen, we can figure things out.”   
“Just shut up for five fucking minutes.”   
Brendon rubbed his face and sighed, giving up and following him through the office. Once in the elevator he tried to move closer to Dallon but the man stepped forward, staring at him with tired eyes. He didn’t want to let him go but he didn’t want to piss him off even more, he grazed gently his hand but Dallon swatted it away, shoving it in his pocket. Brendon sighed and bit his lower lip, closing his eyes and lowering his head a little.   
The car ride was atrocious, they fought and argued and screamed at each other. Brendon wasn’t sure why he had thought that Dallon would want to start over. Brendon was in love with Dallon but he had fucked up badly, oh so badly. When they reached Dallon’s house, Brendon quieted down and looked at his hands, letting Dallon finish his speech in the car. He was tired and he wanted to sleep, he wanted to snuggle closer to Dallon and forget about what had happened.   
As soon as they got inside the house Dallon started to throw Brendon’s stuff on the floor, the bedroom after few minutes was a complete mess since Brendon used to put his clothes even in Dallon’s drawers. He tried to talk to him, he tried to tell him that he was sorry and that he needed to calm down a tiny bit because he had something to say. However Dallon grunted and moved into the bathroom, pushing Brendon’s thing in a bag.   
“Dallon seriously, we can manage to do something, I promise.”   
“We can change things, we can do this and that, Dallon.” He mocked, rolling his eyes and throwing a brush into the bag. “I’m sick of your shit, I’m sick of your childish behavior.” He looked at a pair of shorts and put it in the bag. “Life doesn’t always go as you want. You wanted to break up, you wanted to hide everything because you’re fucking scared to face the truth and I’m sick, I’m too old to deal with you.” He mumbled shaking his head.   
“I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry. I know that I did the wrong thing but try to understand, I’m in love with you.” Dallon let out a sigh and pursed his lips. “I’m telling you the truth, I’m trying but I don’t want to break up, I just want to be with you and try harder.” He muttered stepping closer and resting one of his hands on his shoulder. “Maybe we could change things, yeah? Please don’t make me leave.” He crouched down next to him and looked at him.   
“Yeah, sure.” Dallon said shaking his head. “You won’t change and we both know it, you won’t do anything.” He sighed and rubbed his face. “I just wanted a normal relationship and look what I’ve found. A child who can’t even face the truth.”   
Brendon sighed and moved a bit closer, holding Dallon’s shoulder gently. “I’m just scared, Dallon.” He murmured trying to hug him, failing miserably when Dallon pushed him away. “It’s not easy for me, people accept you because it’s you, they wouldn’t do the same if it were me.” He mumbled sighing, searching his hand and holding it tightly.   
“Leave me alone, Brendon. We have nothing else to say.” He murmured with a sigh, shaking his head. “Apparently you care a tad bit too much about people’s opinion and not about our relationship.”   
“I do care, Dallon, I care so much about us.” He whispered pressing himself on him, kissing his cheek with a sigh. “I’m sorry Dal.”   
“Get off of me, Brendon. I don’t want to deal with your shit anymore.” He wiped his cheek and stood up, giving Brendon the bag full of clothes and other items. “Just call a fucking cab and go away.”   
Brendon looked up at him and sighed, he stood up as well and faced Dallon, biting his lower lip and hugging himself with his arms, feeling cold and exhausted. “I’m in love with you, I’m telling you the truth.”   
Dallon said nothing.

Weeks passed, Brendon was living in a shitty motel since Dallon had kicked him out of their home, he had even thrown his things out of a window and Brendon couldn't really blame him. He had acted like a child and he had been scared by nothing, Dallon wasn't in the closet and he was going to be the CEO of the whole company by the end of the year, which was great for him and Brendon wished him the best because he deserved it.  
Brendon was lonely, he had fucked few guys in the past week but he was still empty, his chest ached whenever he walked into his office and, even if Dallon had promised him to change his task in the company he was still his fucking secretary. He wasn't complaining, that was the only way he had to talk with Dallon but it hurt a lot to see him every day, to hear his voice full of hate and anger toward him. That wasn't the Dallon that he knew, that wasn't the person he loved. Dallon was literally a shell of himself and Brendon felt guilty, because- let's be real- it was only his fault if their relationship had ended.  
Dallon was working hard, he used to stay in his office until late and Brendon tried once or twice to talk about their “thing” but Dallon had dismissed him with an annoyed look and angry eyes. Brendon was still in love, he had never stopped loving him and he was sure that he never would, but he knew that he had to let Dallon alone for a bit, maybe he just had to wait. He had talked with Spencer about what had happened and man, was Spencer angry at him. He had told him that he needed to stop with his childish behavior since Dallon was right, he was scared by his own shadow. Spencer also knew that Brendon was still a bit insecure about his co-workers but Spencer had reminded him that everyone, every single person, in that office knew that Dallon liked both men and women and no one had dared to say something about it.  
Months passed, too, and Brendon was still working in that office but now he was the secretary of his new boss. Dallon didn't work there anymore, he was the CEO now and his office was four floors above Brendon's. They hadn't talked anymore, no “goodbyes, nothing. Brendon had sent him a bouquets of roses for his birthday but Dallon hadn't even texted him. He had gone into his new office once and Dallon had almost chewed him a new asshole. Apparently he was going out with a chick that he had known at a party and Brendon, well, he was totally fine with it. He wasn't dating the new intern just to make Dallon jealous.  
The poor intern- Ryan- really thought that Brendon cared. They had gone to a couple of dates but Brendon wasn't interested, Ryan was shy and he liked to talk about poetry, he had deep thoughts but his voice was too odd, it wasn't like Dallon's. His lips were chapped and too thin, Brendon couldn't bite the lower one and his hands were small, delicate, while Dallon's were big and rough sometimes, perfect for Brendon's skin. Ryan didn't like to leave hickeys and he didn't like oral sex, Dallon did. Ryan's hair was a bit girly and his face was soft, Dallon had short hair and, even if he shaved, his chin always had a bit of stumble that tickled Brendon's lips.  
It was simple, Ryan wasn't Dallon.  
Brendon was still in love with him and that was pretty obvious. However he was more than sure that Dallon and his other co-worker, Travie something, had an affair. Little did he know that Travie was straight as a pole and married. Dallon wasn’t dating anyone nor having an affair with a married man, he was still trying to heal the scars that Brendon had left with his decision and he was sure that it would take a lot. Brendon had been a complete asshole but Dallon still loved him, but he couldn’t let that slip.  
Dallon was the CEO and in his new office had made few friends, Travie was one of them. He was really outgoing, kind of loud and funny. He had a beautiful wife and a child, Dallon had quickly become his best friend and Vicky, Travie’s wife, used to invite him over almost every night, saying that he needed to eat and to get back on his feet. Being friend with Travie meant that, after a night in a pub and few beers later, he had told him basically everything, from how much he missed London to how much he missed Brendon.   
Dallon didn’t know that Brendon was jealous of “that fucking bastard with his fucking stretched lobes”, he didn’t know that Brendon had said a lot of shit to Spencer about Travie, he didn’t know a lot of things. Spencer had tried to convince him that Travie was actually straight and married but, well, Brendon was hard to convince.   
Another month passed and Brendon was now working non-stop, he wasn’t happy and the shitty motel was still his house. He hadn’t tried to talk to Dallon but he had seen him a couple of times, he was friend with Brendon’s boss and that brought him in his office a lot. Brendon had looked at him a lot, he had tried to catch his attention but Dallon hadn’t seemed to notice him. Brendon had known from Spencer who had heard Travie talking about Dallon’s new house, he had moved into a biggest place and he had bought a dog, Brendon didn’t know the name but he betted that the dog was cute and lovely.   
“Brendon!” Spencer shouted smiling. “Brendon wait a second.”   
“What?” He said stepping out of the lift.   
“There’s this party to-”  
“No.”  
“C’mon, we’ll have fun I promise.” Spencer said grabbing his arms gently. “Linda will be there, too, and you promised her that you would come with us.”   
Brendon whined and sighed. “Fine, fine.” He mumbled. “I’m already regretting this.”  
Spencer rolled his eyes and shoved him inside the lift. “You know, you could find someone there, you could try to move on.” Spencer sighed and looked at him. “Have you dumped Ryan yet?”   
Brendon nodded. “Yeah, I did it last week.” He murmured sighing. “He didn’t take it well.”   
“I told you that he liked you a lot.” Spencer yawned and stroked his forehead. “I hope he’ll find someone that actually loves him.”   
Brendon rolled his eyes.   
That night Brendon completely wasted himself. He drank too much and he had smoked a joint before going to the party. It wasn’t that bad, he was having fun but he knew that Spencer was babying him while Linda was trying to make him sit down. Brendon was high and drunk which meant that he wasn’t exactly lucid, thus when he stumbled over few guys, hitting on purpose Travie, Spencer gave up and apologized for him.  
Dallon was at that party, Travie had forced him to go with him and he was bothered by the loud music and Travie had disappeared into the house. He was alone and he had seen Spencer which meant that Brendon was there. He had heard that he had dated a new intern until few days before, but apparently it was nothing serious. It wasn’t like Dallon cared about it, he was over him. He was doing good on his own and he had random one night stands, he didn’t like those people and they didn’t help either but they had kept him busy for a while, even if whenever he fucked someone he would compare them to Brendon.   
In fact, when he spotted him near the bar, he felt his chest ache and his mind started to wander around. He sighed and sat down on an armchair, he looked at him and shook his head with a small sigh, bouncing his leg up and down. He smiled at Travie when he saw him, he pointed at Brendon with his head and Dallon rolled his eyes, sighing.  
“Won’t you say “hi” to him, man?” Travie said loudly.  
“No, it’s not like he’s gonna care.” He sighed and shook his head. Travie sighed and shrugged. “I don’t care.” Dallon said smiling sadly. “I’m going home.”  
“Oh c’mon, live a little and stay with me.” Travie smiled and grabbed his hand, pulling Dallon on his feet. “We’re gonna have fun, trust me.”   
“No alcohol.” Dallon muttered brushing his clothes.  
“Of course, we have to work tomorrow.”   
Dallon rolled his eyes but followed Travie anyway, he was a bit tired but he didn’t want to let his friend down and be a killjoy. He stood and followed him around, he talked with few people and he chatted a little with Spencer, asking him how he was and making small talks until Travie dragged him away, saying that he needed to meet one of his friends. Dallon sighed and followed him anyway, mumbling angrily about how sore his legs already were.   
Travie showed him around for an hour or two, Dallon made few new friends and, at the end of the night, he was a little drunk. He had drunk wine and two glasses of champagne, he was enjoying himself and Travie was surely doing the same. Dallon was smiling and laughing and he was having fun with his co-workers, few interns were there as well and Dallon discovered new people and he flirted a little with an assistant.  
And Brendon saw it.   
He had sobered up and the weed was wearing off, jealousy was making him shake and his hands were trembling. He looked up at Spencer but he wasn’t there. He chewed his lower lip and swallowed hard, he could try to avoid Dallon or he could try to talk to him, maybe if there were people around them he wouldn’t react badly. He walked toward him and he felt his heart beat faster and louder, he was sweating too and his knees were like jelly, he didn’t feel that good.   
“Oh, hey.” Brendon looked up and Travie smiled at him. “You must be Spencer’s friend.” He said smiling.  
“Y-yeah, yeah.” Brendon stared at him and after few seconds Dallon turned his head toward him, his eyes wide and his lips parted. “Hey.”   
“What are you doing here?” He hissed furrowing his eyebrows, making Travie step back.   
“I was- I’m heading to the bathroom.” He murmured lowering his head. “Sorry for interrupting you.”   
Dallon rolled his eyes and Travie hit playfully his arm. “Be nice.” He said lowly, making Dallon scoff.   
“Yeah, whatever.”   
The night ended, Brendon was in a bed and Dallon was snoring near him. He didn’t even know how they ended up there, naked and sweaty. Brendon was happy, he felt satisfied with his life after a long time. He rolled closer to Dallon and rested his head on his chest, he had missed his heartbeat and he had missed his scent. He perfectly knew that he would fall asleep after few seconds but he was trying to stay awake, he wanted to remember every second of that night.   
Neither of them had been drunk when they decided to sleep together, Brendon wasn’t high anymore and Dallon wasn’t tipsy. Brendon needed to thank Travie if Dallon had let go of his attitude, they had talked and laughed and the sparkle was just there, it had never died and once Brendon had placed a hand on Dallon’s shoulder because he had been about to fall, Dallon had caught him and patted his back. They had stayed close to each other and, maybe because of two glasses of champagne, they had warmed up.  
Brendon didn’t know if they were going to be together or if Dallon wanted to go slow, either way was fine, he just wanted to be with him. He had missed him, he had missed his touch and his voice, his fingers in his hair and on his back, delicate and soft. Dallon’s fingers were long, Brendon’s body shuddered whenever he thought about them.   
That night they had made love, Dallon had tangled his fingers in his hair and Brendon had attached himself on Dallon, wrapping his arms around his body and hiding his face in his neck. When they had come Brendon had almost cried because he had kissed his head and hold him close to his chest, caressing his back until the last tremors of his orgasm had faded away. They had made out before falling asleep and then Dallon had fallen asleep, his hands were still on Brendon’s back.   
Dallon rolled closer to Brendon and pressed his lips on his neck, humming and breathing in his scent. “Good morning.” He mumbled, his voice still hoarse and scratchy.   
Brendon smiled and rubbed his cheek with a smile. “Hey.” He murmured happily, snuggling closer.   
Dallon looked at him and sighed. “We need to talk a little, Bren.”   
He nodded and grumbled tiredly. “I know, I know.” He sighed and looked at him with a pout. “Are you… are you trying to kick me out again?”   
Dallon shook his head. “No, but we still have to talk about what happened last night.” He sat up and pursed his lips a little, “I don’t regret it, but I still have to apology for how I’ve treated you in these past months.”   
“I’m the sorry one, I acted like a child and I- I don’t really know how I can apologize for it. I mean, I ended our relationship and you had every right in the world to be mad.”   
Dallon hummed and licked his lips. “We were both wrong.”   
Brendon nodded and held his hand, he sat up and rested his head on his shoulder, sighing. “Well, if you want we could try again?”   
Dallon smiled and let his head fall on Brendon’s. “Are you trying to ask me to be your boyfriend again?”  
“Yes, if you want.” He murmured looking up at him.   
Dallon chuckled and kissed his lips with a smile.   
The next morning Dallon woke up with Brendon curled up on his chest, he was still asleep but they needed to go to work. That thought made his stomach tighten up, he licked his lips and pushed Brendon away, he tucked him under the sheets and kissed his forehead before heading into the bathroom. He wasn’t really in the mood to worry about what had happen that night but he knew that he needed to decide what to do.   
He didn’t want to let go of Brendon, he didn’t want to say goodbye to him again but he didn’t want to live happily and then crush down. He didn’t want to see Brendon go away, he didn’t want to get burned again, it had hurt too much. He was already anxious and his hands were trembling, he couldn’t even shave but luckily his stubble wasn’t that bad. He dressed up as quick as possible and then he walked back into the bedroom.   
“Wake up.” He said throwing a t-shirt at Brendon.   
He grumbled and sat up with furrowed eyebrows. “What? It’s too early.” He muttered rubbing his eyes. “Come back here.”   
Dallon sighed and shook his head. “Dress up, quick quick, we have to go.” He grabbed his shoes and put them on, eyeing Brendon with a sigh.   
An hour later they were into the lift. Dallon’s chest felt tight and Brendon was holding his hand, just like that day. The memories hurt more than a stab and Dallon didn’t exactly know what to do. Everything had happened so fast, a moment before he was hoping to not see Brendon ever again and few instant later they were making out in a bathroom stall. That morning he had tried to not sink into that warm, fuzzy feeling that made his head light, but he failed miserably when Brendon had kissed him out of the blue, throwing his arms around his neck and shoving a hand in his hair.   
Brendon looked at him and rested his head on his shoulder, Dallon stiffened a little and stared at his feet, he couldn’t breathe. Brendon caressed his knuckles and closed his eyes with a small sigh, he squeezed his hand a little and pressed a small kiss on his jaw, nosing his cheek. Dallon glared at him and loosened his grip on his hand, but Brendon held it even tighter, almost crushing his fingers.   
“Can you walk with me to my desk?” Brendon murmured swinging their hands a little.   
“Why?” Dallon said looking at the lift’s doors.   
“Because I want to show you my new place, so you can come and visit me during the day.” He smiled and kissed his jaw. “If you want, of course.”   
Dallon sighed and hummed, he felt Brendon snuggle a little closer and hid his nose in his neck. They walked out of the lift and Brendon dragged him around, their hands were still clasped together and Brendon was smiling, Dallon was a bit taken aback and he didn’t know what Brendon was planning but he wasn’t complaining. Once they reached Brendon’s desk, he let go of his hand, his breath was still stuck in his throat.   
“See you later?” Brendon murmured placing his hands on his shoulders, Dallon nodded. “Good.”   
Brendon pushed himself on his tiptoes and kissed Dallon gently, he heard him gasp in surprise and he smiled, brushing his cheeks with his thumbs. He pulled back and saw Dallon smile, that small and shy smile that he had missed for months. Everything was going to be okay.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys, here's the sequel. I hope you've enjoyed this.   
> The title means "Hold my hands, you won't drown", always from that Italian band.  
> See you soon!


End file.
